set one's cap at
To choose a man as a potential husband (for a girl).
Meaning adapted from Wiktionary, available under CC BY-SA 4.0.
“She set her cap at the new neighbor.”
“She sets her cap at the doctor because he is very kind.”
“Does she plan to set her cap at the new teacher?”
“Everyone noticed how she set her cap at the wealthy visitor during the summer dance.”
“My grandmother told stories about how she set her cap at a handsome soldier she met at the train station.”
“In the old novel, the main character sets her cap at the farm owner to help her family.”
“Determined to secure her future, the young woman set her cap at the eligible bachelor despite his cold reputation.”
disputed origin
The idiom is probably a calque of the French phrase *mettre le cap sur*, which describes the act of setting a course for a specific destination. It implies a certain navigational resolve, treating the object of one's romantic interest as a geographical coordinate to be reached by steady steering. Though the English usage suggests a more domestic or social pursuit, the underlying metaphor remains one of maritime transit.
- 01
abound in one's own sense
To follow one’s own inclinations and opinions.
- 02
ace up one's sleeve
A surprise advantage of which others are not aware.
- 03
act one's age
To behave in a manner appropriate to one's age.
- 04
act one's age, not one's shoe size
Synonym of act one's age (“to behave in a mature manner; to avoid being childish”).
- 05
afraid of one's own shadow
Exceptionally timid.
- 06
air one's dirty laundry in public
To reveal one's sordid secrets to the public.
- 07
air one's dirty linen in public
Synonym of air one's dirty laundry in public.
- 08
albatross around one's neck
A characteristic, possession, associate, or previous deed that hinders one's ability to succeed.
Last updated August 10, 2026