spank the monkey
To masturbate by stimulating one's penis.
Meaning adapted from Wiktionary, available under CC BY-SA 4.0.
“He went to the bathroom to spank the monkey.”
“Living alone in that small apartment, he had plenty of time to spank the monkey.”
“The crude novel depicted the lonely protagonist, night after night, drinking cheap wine and spanking the monkey until dawn.”
- 01
as clever as a cartload of monkeys
Very clever, cunning or mischievous.
- 02
barrel of monkeys
Someone or something very amusing or funny, fun, mischievous, etc.
- 03
brass monkey
Very cold.
- 04
brass monkeys
Very cold.
- 05
cheeky monkey
An impudent person, usually a child.
- 06
get one's monkey up
To make someone angry, annoyed or irritated.
- 07
grease monkey
A mechanic, often with the specific connotation of an automobile mechanic.
- 08
like butter on a bald monkey
Very smooth.
Last updated August 10, 2026