play the ball and not the man
To object to someone's argument by attacking the argument itself instead of them or a facet of their personality; to avoid or make the opposite of an ad hominem attack. Usually considered a positive action, and an avoidance of a fallacious argumentative technique. Often used in comparison to play the man and not the ball.
Meaning adapted from Wiktionary, available under CC BY-SA 4.0.
“Please play the ball and not the man during this debate.”
“She always plays the ball and not the man during difficult work discussions.”
“Good leaders play the ball and not the man to keep the conversation professional.”
“If you want to win this argument, you should play the ball and not the man instead of insulting his character.”
“The manager reminded the team to play the ball and not the man when reviewing each other's mistakes during the project meeting.”
“You will gain more respect if you play the ball and not the man by criticizing the plan instead of the person who wrote it.”
“A truly productive discussion requires all participants to play the ball and not the man, focusing strictly on the merits of the proposal rather than personal grievances.”
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ball hog
In team sports, a player who keeps the ball to themselves, rather than passing it.
- 02
ball of fire
A person who is especially active, ambitious, hard-working, or high-achieving.
- 03
ball of malt
A glass of whiskey.
- 04
balls of steel
Courage, audacity.
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balls to the wall
With maximum effort or commitment.
- 06
be a man
To put up with something or take responsibility for it; to deal with something, such as pain or misfortune, without complaining.
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be one's own man
To behave independently without the influence of others.
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be the bigger man
To walk away from a conflict to prevent it from escalating.
Last updated August 10, 2026